Sneaky Cat Tricks

Abby looking all sneaky. She crawled into our biscut bowl for a nap.

Mr. Bernie and I have very different methods of getting ready to go to sleep. I got to thinking about this last night after he made a big production of, “getting his corners.”  I tend to toss all the covers off me and only use them in case of emergency snow falling in the bedroom.  The Mr. bundles up as if he is in Antarctica, even in the summer.

When he gets into bed, he looks for the corners of the sheet and blankets. Then he layers them and tugs them towards his side of the bed. Announcing, “I’ve got my corners. Do you?”  Then he sits up and gathers up my corners and tosses them over me. At which point I quickly toss them off .  Once I toss them off, he starts to whine. “If you don’t have your corners, you will try to steal mine when you get cold.”  Its a risk I’m willing to take.

The Mr. has taken drastic measures to make sure I keep my corners. He has trained our 13lb. cat  Abby, to lay on me when its bedtime. She has claws that can slice through metal. One does not want to have an exposed body part when she is in bed with you.  He will only pet her at bedtime if she is on me. If she goes to his side of the bed he stops petting her. If I won’t  “get my corners” the Mr. will start to pat Abby’s back really hard, she likes that. That causes her to start kneading, hard. I need to have my covers on me if I don’t want to be gutted like a fish.

He is a clever one, as I didn’t realize he trained he to do this until recently. I was whining to him that she is always kneading on me at night. Why does she not knead on him? Mr. Bernie looked at me very smugly and said, “Because I trained her to do that. It makes sure that you keep your corners on you. Abby knows I will only pet her if she is laying on you. See how clever I am?” I was shocked. What a dirty trick. I decided to test his theory by patting the Mr. and having Abby go lay on him. He quickly put his hands under the covers and she went back to my side of the bed. At which point he started patting her and saying, “Good Girl, Abby. That is a good girl. You like snuggling with Bernadette.”  I’ll be dipped if she didn’t stay there all night. Forced to keep covers on by my cat.  That’s dirty pool.

I think I will teach Scoobie, our dog, to wake Mr. Bernie up.  How do I get her to do it? Perhaps a bit of peanut butter on his forehead might do the trick.  However, I’m open to suggestions.


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  1. Men are so weird (our men especially)…I can’t believe he trained her to do that tho – impressive! I think I might pretend like he wants to have a fencing match or wrestling match with me. “Oh yeah, I’m in my corner. Are you ready for some of this?” I’d say pointing at myself. :)

  2. LOL…. why a fire sale from 1970's porn studio, of course.

  3. Invest in a round bed. Solves that whole corner issue.

  4. Thanks for the follow and linking up at Relax and Surf Sunday. I'm following you back.

  5. Oh, Abby is a "basement kitty". Did you ever hear of LOLCat – I Can Has Cheeseburger" website. Black cats are called "basement kitties". You'd love this site! It's all cat photos with captions and videos.

    Tigger is my 13lb piece of leaded fur that sleeps with all night. I've learned to roll over and around him. I will admit it's a relief when he jumps off the bes. But GOD FORBID YOU MOVE THE CAT!!!

  6. Well you could tie Scoopies leash to the "corners" and ask her if she wants to go for a ride at 2:00 am then you don't even need to leave the bed! The covers will be ripped away, cat will slid off with the sheets and the Mr. will be awake enough to let the doggie out, oh, and as long as he is up if he could set up the coffee pot that would be great. ;)

    • OH MY GOD! That is perfect. "as long as he is up he could set up the coffee pot" I was drinking when I read that. I know better than to do that, but there you go. Thank you. *lol*

  7. So, have you got your corners? Lol! That reminds me of something you would see on a sitcom. Love it!

  8. Now that is funny and a testament to the effectiveness of using ones brain (and the coercion of innocent furry household pets…ie…the children) to obtain ones goal. All outcome based I am sure my lovely brother will tell you. You did marry an industrial engineer who graduated at the top of his class…LOL

    • Yes, I agree with you. He keeps me on my toes. Some days I long for someone I don't have to bring my A game with in a battle of wits. However, I wouldn't change him a bit.

      • I know…I always had to bring my A game growing up…so I feel your pain! I too would not change him a bit, I rather like the challenge when I am well rested.

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