Mr. Bernie and I work together. Yesterday, I was feeling a bit squirrely. I said to him, “Have I told you lately that I love you?” His reply was, “No, you haven’t. How much do you love me?” I thought of the largest amount I could think of and said, “I love you to infinity and beyond.” After all its good to quote a cartoon character and learn science from them. Without missing a beat he replied, “That’s impossible.” Which caused me to get all pissy and annoyed. I was not a good student in science. I snapped, “Why, not?” We are both mature like this and like to bait each other He replied, “You can’t even get to infinity. So you can’t get beyond infinity. Heck, you can’t even get half way to infinity. Even a 100th way to infinity is so close to infinity that you can’t get there. Thanks for trying though.”
What the hell did he just say and what does it mean? Also, Buzz Lightyear is a lying bastard. That’s what this tells me. If you have been following me for a while, you realize Mr. Bernie is very book smart. This reminded me of our “pillow talk” about cubes. That was fun and special. Not! He enjoys science shows. They bore me to tears. We do make our differences work. For example: He likes to watch about worm holes and quantum physics. I like Sister Wives, Judge Judy and Hoarders. We only use the one t.v. so we take turns. One night we might watch something that will make my eyeballs bleed and the next night it might be Toddlers and Tiaras. Does that make us an eclectic couple or just plain weird?
To get back to my story. After I was schooled on infinity we let the matter drop. Once we got home Mr. Bernie said, “Oh, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways…….one Mississippi, two Mississippi.” He got up to 198 Mississippi before I told him that I got the idea. I’m a little slow. It did have me laughing as he kept droning on and on.
Lets re-cap shall we? Buzz Lightyear is a lying bastard. You cannot love someone to infinity and beyond. However, you can count up to 1,000 Mississippi but it takes a while. About 17 1/2 minutes if you were wondering.
Btw: That image above the symbol for infinity. No, I didn’t know that on my own, Mr. Bernie told me. Not very grand is it? Looks like a little kids car race track.