Mr. Bernie thinks he is a 12 year old boy, trapped in a 51 year old man’s body. That is part of his charm. He doesn’t mind looking and acting silly. If he sees an opportunity to be a goof ball, he grabs it with both hands and feet. It makes life a bit more fun. Because we both have the same sense of humor, its hard for us to embarrass each other. Things that would cause most married couples to die of embarrassment or run out of a store screaming are just daily life for us.
Last night was a prime example of such shenanigans. I found a lovely lime green witches hat with a black veil at the grocery store. Who doesn’t need one of those? I have a craft idea in mind for it. Mr. Bernie snatched it out of the cart and grumbled looking for a price. He then asked why I needed a lime green hat. I explained for a craft and he just rolled his eyes. We kept on shopping.
We split up and went up into separate aisles to speed things up. (I needed my coffee creamer. I was out and getting bitchy without it.) When we finally reunited I had a heck of a surprise waiting for me. Mr. Bernie was wearing my witches hat and had the veil pulled over his eyes. All I could do was laugh. He ignored me and kept shopping. The looks he received were priceless. Mr. Bernie is 6’2″, so it’s not like you could miss him. He went on as if nothing was unusual. I love this man! When he had to go to the meat counter he took the hat off. The veil didn’t allow him to see the meat case very well.
We split up a second time. As he was going to the check out he saw his brother in a check out line. Mr. Bernie hid behind a shelf, so only his eyes could be seen. He said, “Pssst, you with the yellow pen in your pocket.” His brother didn’t pay attention. He tried again, “Hey, you with two yellow pens and sunglasses in your pocket.” His brother didn’t even flinch. However, the girl in line next to the brother was paying attention to Mr. Bernie. Mr. Bernie tried one more time, a little louder. “Hey, you with the two yellow pens and sunglasses in your pocket wearing a white baseball hat.” That still did nothing. Finally, the girl standing next to brother nudged him and pointed to Mr. Bernie.
It was time to check out. Mr. Bernie was joking with the clerk. I noticed some stickers next to the cashier. I told Mr. Bernie, “You have been such a good boy shopping, we might be able to get you a sticker.” His eyes lit up and he said, “Oh, I would love a sticker!” The cashier told us that she can’t use the store stickers, but she had another kind in her drawer. She put a sticker on Mr. Bernie’s shirt and said, “A pink puppy sticker for you.” He patted his chest and said loud and proud, “I have a pink puppy sticker. Do you see my nice sticker? I bet you wish you had a pretty, pink puppy sticker!”
Things like this are why I love my husband.