Chew in My Ear

tortilla-chips

When I was a Directory Assistance Operator I couldn't stand people chewing in my ear! Some people chewed their gum like it was going out of style. Others would eat a whole seven course meal while on the phone with me. To this day I can't stand it when people chew in my ear on the phone. My girlfriend's know this and sometimes like to eat a cookie or something while talking to me. To be honest, Jenny does it more than Michele. Jenny also likes to exaggerate and be extra loud. Its like she can physically see me cringe and it gives her glee. That being said, I love to have someone stand next to me and chew a chip right in my ear. My ear has to be right next to their cheek and it makes me giggle like a mental patient.  I blame my mother for that. Many years ago she put her check next to my ear, I don't remember how or why, and chewed a potato chip in my ear. I giggled like I had not giggled in a long time. Then I did the same thing to her and she giggled. My dad just looked at us like … [Read more...]

~Bernie

Welcome To My Blog

Welcome

Welcome to my blog! I'm so happy to have all you folks from SITS stopping by! Feel free to poke around while you are here.  Relax and have a laugh or two. It's always nice to have new visitors to the blog. My "About Bernie" page will fill you in on the highlights of life in Montana. Well at least in our part of Montana. I would have baked you an angel food cake, however, you don't want any of my angel food cakes. I would love to show you  my weird and wild purses. You should run across a post or 50 about my husband ,Mr. Bernie, the super hero. Here is a post with him in his super hero costume.  While you are here, be sure to meet my Cabana Boy, Gunther. Most of my readers think that he is something else.  I do Wordless Wednesdays a bit differently around here.  I post vintage ads with my own snarky observations thrown in. With Valentine's Day coming up, Mr. Bernie and I are clueless where to go this year. Last year we had a romantic dinner at Subway, complete with table linens and … [Read more...]

~Bernie

How to Make a Big Job Bigger

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This week I mentioned to Mr. Bernie that we need to clean our bedroom. We do a fine job keeping up the main parts of the house, but our bedroom gets put on the back burner. I told him that if we BOTH tackled the room, it would get done faster. What I had in my head for cleaning the bedroom and what the Mr. had in his head, were two different things. Yesterday morning he pulled EVERYTHING out of our closet and laid it on the bed. I about had an aneurysm when I saw that! Then he proceeded to hold a couple of items up and say, "I have never seen you wear this. I was thinking of putting it on Ebay." What? Are you kidding me? Who is this man? I gently explained to him that it was a summer shirt my Mom sent me for Christmas. I have not had a chance to wear it in our winter weather. Then tried again, "Have you ever worn this? What is this? How about if I put it on Ebay?" All I could do is grind my teeth. I can't remember the last time he put anything on Ebay. I'm still taking in the fact … [Read more...]

~Bernie

Words With Friends

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Facebook has a fun game called, "Words With Friends." It's like scrabble, with letter tiles and points for words. I held off on playing this game for as long as I could.  Almost like Farmville or something similar. Once you start  you can't stop. You play a word and then you wait until your friend plays and word and so on and so forth. I just started getting into this game a couple of weeks before my birthday. The first person I played with was my friend, Jenny.  I knew she would beat me, but for the most part we would stay pretty even score wise. Then other friends started to ask me to play. I would have several games going at any given time. I didn't want to be stuck at my computer playing words all night. It's a big addicting.  Jenny told me that she played it on her Kindle. Which causes me to start playing on my Kindle. I can watch t.v. or read and still stay caught up on my games. At least I used to be able to, until this past Wednesday. On Wednesday I had a nail appointment … [Read more...]

~Bernie

Mr. Bernie is Sneaky

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Mr. Bernie kept asking me what I wanted for my birthday. I kept putting him off. We just had Christmas and I really didn't "need" anything. I had a list of things I wanted, but nothing I really had a need for. One of the things I mentioned I would like was a Kindle Fire.  I already had a Kindle, which he bought me a couple of years ago.  So the Kindle Fire was not a need but a want. Something I was pretty sure I would not be getting this year. A week or two, before my birthday, we were at Target.  It was a Friday. Mr. Bernie  was looking for noise canceling head phones. I was looking at the Kindle Fire and trying not to drool on them. I think the store would frown if I had shorted out their Kindle Fire by drooling all over them. Since he was being so pokey, I decided to look in the case where they kept the Kindles. Suddenly, I was stopped dead in my tracks. There was an open Kindle Fire on sale for $139.00!! The normal price is $199.00. I started doing the pee-pee dance, I was so … [Read more...]

~Bernie

Make Me Look Pretty

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It's that time of the year, Mr. Bernie needs a haircut. A special time that comes around a few times a year.  He starts to look scruffy and I suggest a haircut. He whines and throws down the, "Its winter, my ears will get cold" card. I trump that card with the, "You look like a homeless person" card. We toss down a few more cards back and forth and the appointment is made. I keep reminding him that it shouldn't be this difficult to get a grown man in for a hair cut.  He knows what to expect by this point in his life. It's not like he is a little boy going to get his first hair cut. I reminded him that if his Hair Goddess has a sticker and he is good, he can get a new sticker. That seems to cheer him up. We are big on stickers at our house. Yesterday was hair cut day. His appointment was right after work. That meant I got to tag along because there was no time for me to go home first. While we waited we thumbed through a hairstyle magazine. He pointed out the styles and liked and … [Read more...]

~Bernie